Lent Preparation: Letting Go of the Mom Guilt

Lent

Guest Writer: Deena Simair

My goal for Lent was to focus on the betterment of me in four categories: the physical self, the intellectual self, the spiritual self and the mental self.  You can read about my own word goal for the year here .

This past week I have been focusing on my mental health which gave me a huge revelation: I need to get over feeling guilty about taking time for myself when I know I need it.

We went to Edmonton last week for a little family vacation and last-minute, Dan had to fly to Winnipeg on the final day.  His last-minute schedule change meant I had to do the last day with just the kids and the 5 hour drive home.  Thank goodness my kids are generally well-behaved and easy to handle, but it is tiring to parent alone, especially in Ikea.

Edmonton Family Day

When Dan got back from his trip, he offered to take the kids for a couple of hours. Mom guilt immediately set in…. Why is it I felt selfish for the 3 hours of alone time WHEN I HAD JUST PARENTED 3 DAYS ALONE.

My husband is a capable parent.  Why do I feel like I need to care of him too?  Why do I feel like I need to be EVERYWHERE my family goes?

How many of us plan out meals for our husbands or line up activities for them when we’re gone out for a few hours of rejuvenation with the girls? Why do we do it?  Why do I feel the need to cut my Red Lobster/Winner walk dates with my friends short because I feel the need to ALWAYS be with my family?

I need to remember that by taking those few hours of solitude, I am recharging my batteries so I can be a better mom.  Everyone wins, really.  Kids get quality time with Dad, I get stuff done and everyone is happy.

I have come to realize that I need to work on being a more guiltless-me.  I know the importance of taking care of myself, so why can’t I just go with it and get over the fact that maybe I’m not needed ALL THE TIME?

Here are a few reads I have started to help nurture me during this blessed, but hectic season of life. It really is important that we pay attention to what we need and sometimes that means concentrating on the me instead of everyone else in your care.

And for me, that means getting rid of the guilt.

Reads and recommends of the week:

My blogging friend, Lisa recommended this book.  I’m intrigued because it links in my spiritual goal as well.  I currently have it on hold for the audio copy.  I think this would be a good listen whilst I drive.

Joyce Meyer

A newer blog that I’ve started following, Beth from Our Pretty Little Girls, wrote a really good post about her realization about her seasonal depression and how she deals with it.

PRetty little girls

struggling to smile

Any tricks of the trade to share with me today?

Meet the Author:

Hey! I am Deena Simair and I’m a multi-tasking mom who juggles a full-time career as a high school French teacher, has a love of blogging and many different passions.
You can check out Deena’s blog here.
Shoes to Shiraz

 

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3 thoughts on “Lent Preparation: Letting Go of the Mom Guilt

  1. We mommies are so much better after a little time to ourselves. And when we pamper ourselves a little. By doing so, we are also passing a long a very important, healthy message to our own daughters. In some weird way I like it when my daughters remember me as the self-sacrificing mom with only two pairs of shoes, who ate the burned toast, did without so they could have more. But I was often the cranky, grumpy mom. I might have been so much more fun if I had just allowed myself to come first once in a blue moon. Thoughtful post, Deena.

  2. We are definitely better Moms when we get some time to ourselves. I currently suffer from the same thing. I took Saturday morning and went to a beauty event and felt all sort of guilty when I got home, to the point I snapped at my husband telling him to stop making me feel guilty and he just said, I’m not making you feel guilty, you are doing that on your own…yikes! Need to work on this myself.

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